Darian Gedwyn
Sitter for the Blue Ajah

Part Ten : Crossroads

“Anyone will suffer bad luck during his life, so it’s not right to judge people by their success or bad luck. It’s how they deal with these situations that determines who they are…”

~ A wise person…

“Are you sure, Darian?” Isabelle sounded worried and Jason’s face expressed doubt as well. Even the doctor, who had shown up out of the blue, seemed to have mixed feelings towards this.
"Yes, yes. I’m positive. I have some business to attend to. Don’t you all worry, I feel perfectly fine. It’s been more then six months ago now.”
The four of us were standing in Cairhien’s harbor. I was about to leave for Tear, or at least that what I had told them. As far as they knew I had business to attend to in Tear. Isabelle had assimilated the news with mixed feelings, while her doctor thought it was madness for me to travel in my condition – an opinion I didn’t share. Jason didn’t seem to like the idea either, but that was for more selfish reasons. I believe he had never abandoned hope I would change my mind and decide to make my comeback on the Cairhienin scene. Now we had gathered in the harbor and my luggage was brought on board of a fast barge, he was finally confronted with reality.

“I still believe it’s madness, young man. Some of your wounds are…”
“My wounds have healed completely, doc. The only thing that keeps bugging me is my thumb and that’ll last for the rest of my life.”
“Still, Darian…” Isabelle made a final effort in convincing him. “Why don’t you stay here a little while longer?”
“I can’t live on your back forever, Isabelle. And by the way, I’ve heard you won’t stay in Cairhien for too long either. You’re getting transferred back to Mayene now your first is in town, aren’t you?”
“Yes I am, but…”
“No buts… I’m thankful to all of you but now it’s time to move on. Perhaps someday I’ll come visit you in Mayene. Anyhow, Cairhien is a past chapter for me.” It seemed the trio on the quay didn’t consider this discussion closed, but I noticed the gang-way was being removed and the ship was about to set sail, so I simply turned around and walked away from the rail – the easiest way to end this sentimental chit-chat. Two sailors came to pick up my luggage and I tipped them both a silver piece. There was plenty of money, or at least there would be.
Next, I walked to the forecastle and leaned with my back against the rail, looking at the industrious sailors while the ship slowly moved away from the quay. The three figures on the shore were waving and I waved back briefly. I’ve never been fond of sentimentalities.
Finally the trio was too far away to be seen and I was relieved to turn my back at Cairhien and its problems. I filled my lungs with air and was pleased to feel it didn’t hurt anymore to do so.

It had taken an awfully long time to recover completely, so in the end I had to believe them: I must have been on the verge of death. The concussion of my brain had left no damage – praise the Light – and my mind was as clear as ever. All of my injuries had healed and all that was left was a great deal of scars.
I was wearing black linen pants and a stylish half-long jacket. Underneath I wore a white silk shirt I left half unbuttoned. The cool breeze blew over my chest and the cobweb of scars that ran across. I had resumed physical training as soon as I was able to and I had lost virtually nothing of my form or physical strength. My swordsmanship on the other hand…
I stared with horror at my right hand and its paralyzed thumb. It would be impossible ever to wield a sword again if the hand did not recover and I had lost all hope to see that happen. All I could do was trying whatever one-handed style there was, but that would mean all these years of training were in vain. Apart from the reflexes and strategic insights, the vast majority of things I was taught was useless now and that bothered me.

Standing on the forecastle I placed my hands on my hips and suddenly became aware of the showy short sword Isabelle had offered me as a goodbye present. It testified of her ability to enter into my person, but she had failed to come up with a solution that actually pleased me. The sword was way too expensive and showy to be effective and after a closer look I had concluded the sword wasn’t made to be of practical use.
For a moment there my irritation got the upper hand and I was about to fling the useless piece of craftsmanship into the water, but then changed my mind. Even if it wasn’t useful to me, people knew I had it with me. It might come in handy to set out a false track. Especially since I wasn’t headed for Tear as I had told everyone.
I grinned wolfish… The 1 433 764 gold sovereigns waiting for me in Mayene would have to wait.

Eleven days later – the bark finally approached the place where the Iralell and the Eranin flowed together. It had been a boring journey with lots of adverse winds and a two-day delay in Aringill. The port master and the captain were unable to agree upon the taxes. The port master said the tax rates had increased now the political situation in Cairhien had changed. Apparently the new government hadn’t made agreements on lower tax rates with Andor as the previous one had. To me it was the umpteenth example of the ignorance of the Dragon and his crew of savages and renegade Aes Sedai to govern a country the way it should be.
Realizing it was a good stunt to draw attention, I offered the captain to pay the additional taxes. It ensured me the man was in my debt and apart from that it would be a good lead for anyone following my tracks. If they heard I had paid the taxes here – which they certainly would – they would be confident I hadn’t lied about the ultimate destination of my journey.
But now this part of my journey had come to an end. I had the captain take me ashore with my luggage in a rowing-boat. Then the barge left, as if nothing had happened, officially still having Darian Gedwyn on board – off course traveling under a fake name.
Some time later I was picked up by one of my most trusted men and two days later we arrived in Far Madding.

Surrounded by the hills of Kintara and shielded by the huge Ter’angreal that blocked off the One Power I felt secure for the first time in months. Here I could do no harm to myself.
I was the proud owner of a stately house in the city. It wasn’t as big as the one I used to have in Cairhien, but it was a house and still a big one as well. And it was mine… For the first time in a long time I felt safe AND independent. It had the additional advantage that no one was aware of the fact that I owned this house, and I didn't have any reputation in this city either. Here I was a perfect stranger; I was relieved.
Vincent and Stefan, the two men who had looked after the house during my absence were two people I had a blind trust in.
Vincent was still a young man rather than an adult. Two years ago he had ended up in a duel with a hot-tempered young aristocrat. It had something to do with a girl – obviously. Out of the blue I had offered Vincent to be his second and that alone had sufficed for the challenger to withdraw from the duel. Vincent was still grateful to me and when the girl turned him down after all for the young aristocrat Vincent had felt it necessary to leave Cairhien. I had offered him an occupation as a caretaker of my house in Far Madding and Vincent had accepted. Stefan was a local who helped Vincent out once in a while.

The first thing I did upon arriving was collecting the silver keys each man had been entrusted by me. Along with a third key – the one I always wore on an chair around my neck, the one that opened the lock to the cellar where I had stocked my gold in my house in Cairhien – the keys would open the door of the safe in this house where I kept some financial reserves.
Most shortsighted people thought I kept all my gold somewhere at home, but I had always seen to it the money was transferred out of Cairhien as soon as possible. Here in this house I had laid by a little money for a rainy day – twenty thousand gold sovereigns. The vast majority of the money, however, was always shipped to Mayene, where it was saved up in a few local banks with Isabelle’s expert assistance. That was how I had met her in the first place.
Off course, in order to keep this hidden from anyone but my most trusted co-operators, I always kept a considerable amount of money in the basement at home. That amount was now lost, as was to be expected. I had been to the ruins of my house once and had noticed the pits in between the rubble where treasure-diggers, attracted by the legends of my wealth, had been looking for my money. I’m sure the discoveries will have been disappointed; not that there wasn’t a considerable amount of money in that basements but in the imagination of many people my fortune must have taken ridiculous proportions. And after all, the actual amount was indeed one that made even my head spin.

On the first evening I gave a private party, with only Vincent and Stefan present. I had decided to stay in Far Madding for a while, but that turned out to be disappointing. After the months spent on Isabelle’s properties, hunting, reading, strolling through the many parks and gardens or in discussion with Isabelle, Far Madding turned out to be incredibly boring. Not that the town itself was boring; actually it was a prosperous trade city. I just didn’t know anyone and I didn’t feel like starting all over making social contacts. And – to be perfectly honest – I must admit I actually missed Isabelle.
I still hadn’t completely recovered from the loss of Aurore, but in the past months I had learnt to appreciate Isabelle’s company. After all, she was a very intelligent and keen-witted young woman and those were qualities I highly appreciated in women. And yes, it must be said she was a rare beauty and I realized I missed the sight of her perhaps as much as the long conversations. After all, Far Madding had to offer nothing but boring, slow merchant-daughters.
I realized I had become spoiled and exacting and did my utmost best to revive my appreciation for the simple life in Far Madding. I managed till a certain extent.

Still, there was something to drive away my boredom: the young Vincent. After a while he started to get more and more attached to me. I believe I must have been some sort of father to him. One day he asked me to teach him swordsmanship and so I did. Using the showy sword Isabelle had given me I taught him the basics.
After a while – and with a little encouragement from my side – Vincent started to develop interest in a social life again. He started by going outdoors more and more and since he felt confident because of my support and the success he experienced in the teachings I gave, he managed to conquer his inborn shyness. Three weeks later he started to bring girls back home and from then on the fences were down.
I watched it all with great interest and supported the boy when necessary. He seemed to be doing fine. Another two months passed without any remarkable events that concerned me. Vincent on the other hand was a completely different matter.

After a while I noticed I was getting more and more depressed, without an actual reason. In general I had taken over the same daily habits as in Cairhien, such as meditating, lay out a wonderful garden, physical exercises, reading… From time to time I even accepted an invitation to dinner from a local who had grown curious about my backgrounds. Lately there had been an ever-increasing number of invitations for dinner with the families of the girls Vincent was seeing, though mostly I declined such invitations.
Still, for no specific reason at all I was growing more and more depressed. I noticed the gloomy mood would change for the better on the rare occasions I got out of town. After a while I started suspecting it had something to do with Far Madding itself and its strange Ter’angreal.
I started reading some specific lecture on the subject of channeling, especially about male channelers. In some ancient records in the library of the hall where the Ter’angreal was stored I read about the taint on Saidin and the breaking of the world. There was a passage in which the author described the effect of an Ogier Stedding on the mood of male Aes Sedai, on the run for the taint and the insanity that would follow.
It wasn’t that difficult to conclude the Ter’angreal that shielded Far Madding from the One Power had the same effects on me, since I had accepted the fact that I had to be a male channeler.
It took me another month to gather rags of information on the institutions where channelers were educated. I already knew about the White Tower, since my mother had been an Aes Sedai, but the presence of the Red Ajah inspired few confidence. A little while later I accidentally heard someone speak about a place called the ‘Grey Tower’. At first I thought it was some kind of joke, mocking the White Tower, but as I entered in conversation with the man I learnt there was a second institution where channelers were welcome. The interesting fact was that this Tower didn’t seem to have a Red Ajah and my hope revived.

I had spent a little more then four months in Far Madding and I had tried to ease my gloomy moods by taking long trips outside of town and it helped a great deal indeed. One specific evening Vincent entered the room while I was reading a work on the trolloc wars. I was surprised to find him at home at this hour, since he had been obsessed with taking girls out and he hadn’t been at home in the evening for a long time. Interested in his strange behavior I asked him what was wrong.
“Darian,” he said, “I’ve something on my mind and I wanted to talk to you about it…” A long time ago we had decided to say ‘thee and thou’ so I was perfectly fine with being called ‘Darian’ by him.
“Well then, out with it.” I grinned. “Now what could be bothering a youth like you?”
It took Vincent some time to gather his thoughts, and after some stammering and mysterious grinning he finally took it out:
“Darian, you remember Gladys?”
“Not by name but perhaps I’ve seen her before? What does she look like?”
“Darian! She was the girl I took out last week.”
“The one you were so nervous about? Right, I remember. The one you called the girl of your dreams!”
“Yes, that’s the one. I’m glad you remembered.” Vincent had a blessed grin on his face.
“Now then, you bandit. What about her?” I noticed I had taken over his grin, contagious and spontaneous as it was.
“I’ve been thinking about her all week, and yesterday I couldn’t hold anymore. I had to see her, Darian.”
“I can understand,” I said, having a presentiment where this was going. “So I plucked up my courage and went to her house.” On a soft tone, as if they were conspirators, the young man continued. “I went to the back of her house, I know a place where I can easily climb over the wall…” He grinned again, he seemed very pleased with himself and I wished him the joy of his little victory.
“I see you’ve learnt quite a lot lately,” I chuckled.
“You bet. Now, as I’m sneaking through the gardens I suddenly see her walking within three feet of the place where I was hiding. So then I revealed myself to her and she was very pleased to see me as well. So then we looked for a quiet place and we…”
“Save me the details…”
“…talked for some a long time,” Vincent continued imperturbable and enthusiastic. “Eh, you said something?”
“No, nothing, just go on…” I said, trying to look as innocent as a new-born baby. As soon as I noticed that wouldn’t work I tried at least to hide my grin behind the back of my hand.
“So then…” He inserted a dramatic silence, trying to make me curious. I played it his way.
“Yes? Come on, what happened then?”
“I asked her to marry me off course!” Vincent yelled, supremely happy. “And she said ‘yes’, Darian! She said yes!”
Now there was no way to hide my fun anymore and with a wide grin I complimented him on his achievement, giving him all the time he needed to tell the whole story again with all the bells and whistles.

Afterward we drank to their both health and I started asking some practical questions, such as whether he had already made a formal proposal, whether he had informed her family, if he knew about any other wedding plans her parents might have for their daughter and how he planned to organize his life from now on…
From his replies I could conclude this hadn’t just been an act on the first impulse but rather a well-thought off plan. I was impressed by my young protégé.
“I was planning to start a small business, importing wine or something like that. I’ve heard from some people in town there’s good money in wine.”
“I must dissuade you from doing so. I know from experience just how hard life as a wine trader can be. It could turn out a goldmine, but only if you have the right contacts. The exceptionally good vintages are in most cases reserved for some privileged traders.”
“Then don’t you have any of these good references, Darian?”
“I’m afraid not,” I lied. I knew some people in the branch but I didn’t want anyone to know I was still alive.
Vincent seemed extremely disappointed.
“I’ve got another idea. How about setting up a little trade in luxury-goods? If you have some funds to start with, you can start a trade. Tear knows peace now so the economy should be blossoming. At least it’ll soon be better. If business goes well people feel the need for luxury-goods. Try trading some jewelry, spices or fine tissues. You could even start a shipping company and sail from one country to another. These are interesting times for keen-witted people.”
Vincent seemed interested, yet still sounded a bit uncertain.
“Not a bad idea, Darian. Her father is a trader as well so that gives me some capital to start with. Only, he won’t be pleased to see me come and ask for the hand of his daughter and take his fortune along as well.”

I couldn’t help but burst out laughing. Vincent seemed insulted.
“My lad, if money is the only problem the don’t worry about a thing. You just go out there and ask for his daughter’s hand. Tell him about your idea and assure him you have no need for his money whatsoever. I’ll provide you with twelve thousand gold sovereigns so you can start your own business. The only thing I ask in return is that you spend them wisely. Money doesn’t buy happiness, they say, but in this world it buys power and freedom. I’m offering you a blank ticket to the future so I expect you to do your utmost best to succeed. And for the rest – I blinked an eye – I wish you the best of luck in discovering the virtues and pleasures of marriage. Now go ahead and hurry to your girl. Talk to her about it. Ask her opinion as well before you drag her into anything. Try to be a good husband, right lad?”
“Don’t you ever worry about that, Darian… Sir…” The emotion that sounded from the last word touched me deeply.

The three people in the room had their eyes fixed on me, something that made me feel slightly uncomfortable. Vincent and Gladys sat down on the bench in my living-room. I had poured out a glass of wine for everyone but no one had taken a sip so far. There hung tension in this room and that was mainly due to the sturdy man who was pacing up and down through the room. The two lovers were watching him anxiously, I watched the scenery with a slight feeling of amusement. Gladys’ father William was a bad actor.
“So, mister Gedwyn. If I understand this situation correctly you’re Vincent’s father.” I smiled friendly.
“No I’m not. As I’ve already explained you I’m not Vincent’s father. I wasn’t at that time and I that hasn’t changed so far. I’m more like his guardian though that’s incorrect either since Vincent is an adult man. You could consider me a good friend of his who means well by him. Vincent is my protégé.”
“You must understand, mister Gedwyn, that the proposal your son made couldn’t come at a more tedious moment. There were already arrangements, you see…”
“Yes off course,” I said, ignoring the fact that the man had called Vincent my son again. I knew this was a bluff. I had Stefan do some research and the man was absolutely sure that so far no marriage was arranged for Gladys. It all came down to a bluff, the greedy William had heard Darian’s offer to financially support the young couple with twelve thousand gold sovereigns – a small fortune – and was trying to secure more profit for his daughter.
“I’m very glad to hear you say so, my dear William. Please, have a seat, try your wine. It’s truly one of the finest bottles I’ve tasted in a long time. Cairhien’s first vintage from last year. Very rare since most of the vintage was ruined due to the war, but what has been preserved is most excellent.” William could barely keep his mouth from falling open – Cairhien’s first vintage had been exclusive for many years and last year’s vintage had the reputation to be almost prohibitive. I enjoyed to manipulate the narrow-minded, transparent man; the more so as the vintage was really Cairhien’s first from last year. It made me feel good to know I had managed to secure some of the bottles before the prices went through the roof.

William sat down and had a sip from his wine, ever so carefully. Vincent and Gladys were happy to see a change in the man’s aggressive behavior and had a sip as well. With a smile on my face I observed them.
“Gladys,” I said, deliberately ignoring her father who seemed to be recovering from some sort of shock. “Vincent told me you’re truly amazing at playing the piano. If you wouldn’t mind, dear, could you please treat us to a little sample of your skills?”
“Yes mister Gedwyn,” the girl answered shyly. Perhaps she was a little too shy for the lively Vincent but it was more likely she felt affected by the atmosphere. In fact, even Vincent tried to keep a low profile…
A little later the sparkling sounds of the piano drifted though the room and I had to admit Gladys played wonderfully.
After the final sounds, the three of us started applauding spontaneous and Gladys made bow with a smile on her face. I was glad to see she seemed to have more spirit then I originally thought.

“You have the most remarkable daughter, mister Wellsworth.”
“Thank you,” William Wellsworth said, pleased to hear me compliment his daughter.
“I’m glad you’ve decided to give them your blessing.”
“Eh? Hold a moment….”
“Please mister Wellsworth. We both know you wouldn’t be here if you hadn’t approved of Vincent’s proposal. At least you wouldn’t have brought your daughter along. Now, it’s up to you, shall we drink to the good health and prosperous future of the young couple or will we end our conversation here?”
I was playing with the man, sending him right where I wanted him. In one sentence I had called attention to two major points that would help convince the man: the most exclusive wine and the prosperous future of the couple, making allusions to the twelve thousand sovereigns.
Williams seemed to doubt for a single moment, but then he was first to raise the glass.
“To the good health of the young couple,” his voice rumbled.
“To Vincent and Gladys,” I supported him. The two lovers raised the glass as well, having attention for nothing but the other one. Pleased with what I saw, I slapped William on the shoulder, and promptly the man choked in the wine.

Later that night I took William and Vincent to my study. I walked towards a plank in the wooden wall and turned it open. A small niche in the wall was revealed, showing three keyholes. I inserted the three keys that had kept held by Stefan, Vincent and me. A faint click could be heard and a hidden door opened, revealing a small hidden room, more like a big cabinet. Most of the space was taken by a huge iron safe; I took the three keys from their keyholes and used one of them to open the safe. As they all seemed alike no one would ever know which key it was. Only I knew it was the key that had been in Vincent’s possession.
Inside the safe were, aside from some securities, ten heavy cloth sacks, each containing the exact amount of two thousand sovereigns. I took six of them and placed them on the desk, allowing both William and Vincent to check the content. Gladys had declined my invitation to come along, trusting her father and Vincent would take care of business. It was a remarkable token of trust and I was sure Vincent felt honored. I was even more sure William felt only greed at this moment. The sturdy man buried his fingers in the gold over and over. It was but when Vincent proposed to count the money that William recovered from the gold-fever.
“N-no, that won’t be necessary,” he said on a doubting tone.
I took the six bags, tied them up again and with Vincent’s aid I brought them back to the safe, closing it carefully, as well as the hidden cabinet. I was sure William would have counted the planks in the wall by now, but I knew perfectly well that the safe was well-protected. I handed Vincent on of the keys, in order to show William the gold belonged to him as much as it belonged to me. William had a calculating look in his eyes…

Two weeks later – Vincent and Gladys were married for six days now. They seemed as happy as the day they met and I had good confidence in the outcome of this marriage. Besides the three of us, William and Stefan were present as well. We had gathered outside my house on the court-yard. A carriage was ready to bring Vincent and Gladys to Tear. William and I had hired some men to secure the carriage and its valuable content. My motives were for Gladys and Vincent to be all right, perhaps William had thought more about the six thousand gold sovereigns the couple had along with them. The other six were deposited with a local bank and thus out of reach for anyone but Vincent and Gladys. I trusted everything would go well. The couple was young, ambitious and they had the necessary means of subsistence, even if things would turn out disappointing. Even if their concern would fail, they could always return to William. He wouldn’t dare show his daughter and her husband the door. I guess that was why this interested him so much, he wanted to know whether or not this enterprise would turn out successful. Maybe it was just his way of being concerned.

“So you’re leaving on the same day as we, Darian?”
“Yes indeed,” I smiled lively. I could taste freedom and it tasted morish. “There is nothing that binds me to Far Madding any more. Not for now, anyway. Stefan, take good care of the house as you did before.” I flung him the third key to the hidden room and in William’s eyes flashed a little light…
“Now then, I wish the two of you the best of luck. Work hard, but above all: enjoy your life… together I mean.” I blinked an eye and the two burst out laughing indignant.
“Hey, what are you insinuating?” Gladys demanded and now Stefan and William joined the ones who were laughing. I blinked an eye.
“Take good care of Vincent, will you? In fact he’s still a little boy you know.”
“What the…?” Vincent flared up, a big grin covering his face.
“I’m sorry we have to say goodbye, Darian…”
“We would have to say goodbye anyway, Vincent. You’re leaving anyhow, but now I’m leaving as well.”
“Disappearing would be a better word. You’re disappearing again, Darian?”
I blinked an eye – again. I felt happy and carefree.
“I’m a loner, Vincent. Everyone follows his heart in the end.”
“Yes, yes. I know. But still I’ll miss you…”
“Don’t go and sound so depressed. I hate this kind of sentimentalities.”
Vincent grinned apologetically.
“You know, Darian, my father used to compare life with a long path with many crossroads. I guess this is a crossroad for both of us.”
“It is indeed. Farewell. All of you, farewell.” I waved them all goodbye and before anyone could utter another word I had turned my horse and left the court yard. I wasn’t lying when I said I hated sentimentalities. Galloping freely though the gate, into the free world, my thoughts drifted off to the Tower… I wondered how life would be there… Suddenly I left the shielded area and I was overwhelmed by a feeling of freedom and happiness…
Life was wonderful!

Works by Darian
~ Darian's Raising
~ Where did the Darian Go?
~ Darian Asha'man

Contact Darian
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